Why rush? Well, it’s kinda fun. There isn’t an easy way to explain it, but our minds have a way of getting ahead of us.
No matter how well we practice awareness, there will undoubtedly be some piece of our psyche that is in the future. This is separate from planning, scheduling and organizing. This piece of us is calculated and calibrated based on past experiences. It is paying very close attention to the cues and potentials in your environment. A wink here, a nod there.
The imaginative mind leans into every open space. Every open space contains the canvas for new creation.
Much beauty springs forth from these unconscious endeavors. Ideas that seemingly come out of nowhere, fully formed. When we know that something is possible, you can trust that part of you is imagining the implications and variations of that possibility. The good, the bad, the weird, the beautiful, and the ugly.
Fear rises to the surface when situations have potential for disastrous outcome. In reality, all situations hold the potential for disaster. Whether it is a hiking trip, a new person you are dating, or a flight to Cancun. Just as these events could change your life in an exceedingly positive way, they could also bring about some sort of Tower Card like scenario.
Some things must tear us down so that we can rebuild
The more difficult scenarios you have been in… accidents, shocking break ups, violent interactions… the more that your unconscious will lean towards these outcomes in it’s projected future. If we didn’t learn from our experiences, we would never grow and adapt. Some experiences, however, are so intense that we ‘learn’ a little too deep. A self protective mechanism which we all share.
In April of 2023, I was bit by a rattlesnake while backpacking Arizona’s Grand Canyon. In the end, I was fine, but the experience was so intense that I thought I might die. I can tell you, that in my mind, around every corner and under every cactus or bush, there is a rattlesnake. In a way, this response does make me safer. At the same time, it makes me nervous and fearful, often in situations where there is no risk. I worked with this fear to enjoy hiking again. I have learned about rattlesnakes as much as I can to better understand where and when they might pop up. I keep my eyes on the ground and sweep the brush around me with my trekking poles. Basically, I now have more concern that the snake will exist and pop up. My unconscious is filling the empty spaces around me with rattlesnakes, of all the possibilities, this is the one that my brain creates.
We Won’t Change Overnight
We wouldn’t be here if we didn’t know, innately, how to survive. Survival is more complicated than having food, shelter, and water. Survival requires being prepared for whatever may come. More specifically, survival requires being prepared for the things that could threaten or end your life. On a physical level, things like snakes, bears, big cats, darkness, cliff edges, spiders, lightning, swift moving, deep or dark water are, for the most part, programmed into our DNA to trigger strong responses.
We are not just physical. We are emotional, sensitive, and social beings. In the current evolutionary cycle of society, we are learning to work with other triggers. Until quite recently, being disliked or ostracized from a community could have meant your death. If the village no longer welcomed you, you may have to exist and survive on your own in the wilderness. Being a naysayer to the common narrative of your community may have had you killed as a witch or heretic. For women and children, not obeying the larger and stronger male figures could have had you beaten or killed. In short, challenging the status quo could have meant a lot more than just being disliked or dishonored on social media.
Our human lineage learned this, and your brain remembers this rule of survival. Maybe your mother or father are a bit outspoken, but it is likely that not too many generations ago, most of our ancestors were just following the rules as they were set. Not to be liked or approved of, but to survive. The times in which we live today are very different, but the core of our human nature still remembers how important it is to not ruffle feathers.
Some of us challenge it anyway, and we pay the price of fear, paranoia, being ostracized, and losing status. This is, however, a golden age of free expression. We can romanticize the past prior to the technological revolution. It seems quaint and cute to subsist off the land and have peace. In reality, though, modern times are a beacon of self development. There are obvious flaws in the distribution of wealth and resources, but overall, we don’t have to spend most of our days toiling and stressing over meeting essential needs. This gives us the chance to focus on the patterns that got us all to this point, and the incongruous within them.
Gratitude and Circumnavigating Old Patterning
The practice of gratitude is a subtle way to appease the reactive mind. The part of us that is keenly aware of lack. That part of us that fears it’s own obliteration and thus is preparing for it all of the time. When we go directly at an internal defense system, it simply doesn’t work. The defenses see the affront coming. ‘Like telling someone to CALM DOWN when they are stressed’ it just doesn’t work. The same is true when we tell our survivalist brain to just CHILL. In feeling gratitude, the simple act of being grateful for what you DO HAVE, you are softening the space around the lack mindset. From there, perhaps the lack and fear can be slowly coddled, loved, and supported. If fear cannot be calmed from the reactive state, it cannot receive. Sometimes you have to work around an issue and not go directly at it.
Respect Where You’ve Come From… Don’t Force Change
I wouldn’t expect my brain to ever stop being concerned about my physical safety. This is important to being alive. What I can do, however, is foster a supportive environment around my mind, to remind it that there is a lot of good in the world.
When someone is grieving the loss of a loved one, we cannot take away their grief. We can, though, remind them of what they do have, by being there, consistently, without judgement. The most powerful realizations aren’t taught to us. Instead, they are the ones that we come upon ourselves. Instead of forcing love and nurturing onto others, try to just be there for when they need it. Foster a loving and nurturing environment around yourself, and stay open to sharing this when and where your energy affords it and they desire it.
In the end, if you want to calm down, put yourself in a calm environment. If you can’t change your surroundings physically, do what you can to change you inner state. Soon enough, your nervous system will realize it is okay to relax and allow for the flow of positive thoughts and energy.
When you really want to change, take your time. Be present with WHAT IS.
The initial trigger that motivates you towards change is to be revered and honored. The universe is delivering us the message. Sometimes it is in our body. Say we get digestive discomfort that keeps us from attending an event or making a decision. This little message was us being told what NOT TO DO. Instead of reaching for some medicine to soothe it, be the medicine. Sit with the feeling, see what it has to share with you.
In the treatment of many illnesses, we must never forget why the message came to us in the first place. In my experience, nothing happens by accident. Symptoms across the board from cramping to Auto Immune Conditions. These are examples of our body attempting to alert us to something. Victimhood is easy when you are sick, but resist the urge to diagnose and instead look to listen to the messages from your body. Western medicine was never designed to help you heal. While it may assist you in maintaining during crises, healing happens from within, that is your job.
As the mind reads into the future, assessing potential threats and benefits, the senses in the body work to assist. The body speaks in forms we may never have been trained to listen. We must learn to teach ourselves to HEAR ourselves.
Yesterday I had a conversation with a friend from my past. She expressed to me that the most difficult and awful experiences in her life were the ones that brought her to the awakened state she enjoys today. While at the time, it was a fight for survival, now she has gratitude for those difficult times as they awakened her to a different way of being.
I supported this friend through those times, and to me, it was obvious how those challenges would inevitably serve her. I couldn’t really express that at the time, and I doubt she would have enjoyed hearing that perspective. All that I did was love her with all my heart and be there for her on basic tasks like feeding herself, sleeping well, exercising, and maintaining a social life. I am sure I helped, but that wasn’t my goal. I just tried to be the most centered form of myself. I attempted to be so aligned with me that it infectiously filled my environment with that self love.
Aim to Heal, but Never Expect it of Anyone Else
The older I get, the more experiences and knowledge I gain. Most of it becomes wisdom, but some, not so much (hey I’m human). I look for trends in the waves of life, and there are a few things I have found.
The most important is the significance of time passing. If we don’t give things time to develop, they won’t get very far. Dopamine rushes are a dime a dozen these days. We can simply pick up our phones and scroll through something. This quick hit, however, doesn’t last long and has us craving to feed ever more often. Dating, while a complete minefield, is easier to do than ever. Hookups and fun weekends are fairly easy to come by, but again, don’t serve lasting peace. Most of the time, this kind of practice and lifestyle has us feeling used up and emotionally drained. Sugar is another great example, as are most drugs. A quick fix for energy leads to a drastic reduction quite quickly.
What goes up must come down. If you get high, you’ll also get low. Easy come, easy go.
Now there is nothing inherently wrong with any of these practices. I believe we should do what we want, without hurting others. While I am not a fan of people poisoning their bodies with drugs, chemicals and processed foods, I believe that everyone should explore this life that they have.
The problem comes when we desire something long term and stable. Whether it is our physical, emotional or mental health. Whether it is a career, a legacy, or a long term partnership. The actions that we take daily for quick rushes DO NOT work to create these things.
The more that we take the quick and easy way out, the less likely we are to have things that last. I think you get the point here.
My deepest message is to stay calm with your personal development. Nothing changes overnight, and if it does, you either experienced enlightenment (which indicates you’ve been working on something for a long time), or that it will flip back just as quickly and easily.
If we want to build lasting health and deep presence, we have to start in the moment. We can’t buy it off of the internet, we can’t get it from the doctor, we won’t create it through an Ayahuasca ceremony. While everything can assist us on our journey, it is in every moment and every choice that we sew the seeds of long term change and transformation.
Dedication to any practice is enlivening. A slow build from deep within that nourishes the soil around you. Over time we create fertile ground for fruitful development.
It is at your core, within you. All that you need, all the skills to build a wonderful experience of life, its all right there.
Manage it well, focus on self first. From there, your humanitarian and nurturing side can feed those around you. Remember that when we are out of alignment, we cannot be a guiding light for anyone else. I respect and honor your process.
While it may seem that we are all here to heal, perhaps we are just here to accept that WE ARE HERE. Physically, spiritually, emotionally, we are here to accept and embody the experience. Once this is done, we can begin to move forward.
Xx Bless you and have a wonderful day xX
Gaining this kind of perspective requires patience and support. Sometimes, all we need is someone who can give us a window into that perspective. If you are looking for this, consider reaching out for a session.
I offer 30, 60, and 90 minute sessions. Each will offer the full range of James’ gifts. Astrological insight in a healing and practical container. You’ll receive a recording of our session and can ask him whatever questions feel right to you. Having trouble deciding what to do, where to move, how to handle relationship challenges? James can help, just reach out.
